Baby Loss and Fertility

I am passionate about supporting people through the complex, life-changing experiences of baby loss and fertility issues. This can include:

Difficulties conceiving. Invasive fertility tests and treatments, such as IVF and ICSI. Egg/sperm/embryo donation. Surrogacy. Baby loss, including “chemical” pregnancy, missed miscarriage, molar pregnancy, ectopic pregnancy, recurrent miscarriage, embryo loss, termination for medical reasons (TFMR) and stillbirth. Childlessness not through choice. Pregnancy anxiety, choices or complications. Pregnancy after loss or fertility issues. Birth trauma. Postnatal depression or anxiety.

Within our counselling relationship, the focus of our sessions is on you and I will therefore rarely share details of my own personal life, unless it is likely to be beneficial to you. With this in mind, I would like to share that I have experienced many of the above difficulties and therefore may have a deeper sense of what you are going through. You are a unique individual with your own story to tell, so I haven’t walked in your exact shoes, but I have trodden a similar path. As a result, I will never tell you to relax, give unsolicited advice, try to find a “silver lining” or minimise your pain, as I know how hurtful and unhelpful this can be. What I will do instead is walk alongside you as you navigate your journey, acknowledging and wholly accepting all of your feelings and experiences.

I notice many reoccurring themes in my counselling sessions, and you may feel that some of these resonate with you? Perhaps you find yourself….

• Questioning your identity. Wondering who you are and what purpose you attach to your life, if you don’t have the family that you envisioned.
• Experiencing relationship issues with your partner. You might be grieving in different ways, aren’t communicating as well as you used to, or can’t agree on what decisions to make.
• Feeling left behind in your friendship circles, ‘stuck on the outside looking in’.
• Battling heavy, complex emotions such as shame, guilt, anger, resentment, envy, despair or emptiness, but you can’t express this in front of others for fear of being judged.
• Alone and isolated, with few people able to truly understand what you’re going through.
• Unable to live in the present, with one foot constantly stuck in the past or future.
• Worrying about worst case scenarios and battling intrusive thoughts.
• Under pressure, emotionally, biologically and financially.
• Disconnected from your loved ones, work…yourself, even.

This is by no means an exhaustive list and you may well bring something completely different to our sessions. Whatever you choose to talk about, I hope I can give you the safe space that you need to explore, and that you know what a privilege it is for me to hear your story.

Lastly, I am always striving to enhance my skills and knowledge in the field of baby loss and fertility counselling, to ensure that I am at my very best for you. I am a member of The British Infertility Counselling Association (BICA) and I have been trained by both The Stillbirth and Neonatal Death Charity (SANDS) and The Foundation for Infant Loss (FIL), as a Rainbow Baby and Infertility Specialist. I endeavour to continue learning - academically, professionally and emotionally – in this very important space.